Prodigals... (part three)

Prodigals are never easy to deal with from a parent's perspective. They are self-centered, self-indulgent and just down right disrespectful. The first thing you want to do is grab them up and "ring their neck".

But in this post today, I just want us to remember the Prodigal's Dad in the parable Jesus told in Luke. Even in the son's rebellion, the Dad never showed anything but love.

Remember in the midst of our own rebellion our heavenly Father shows us love, even in His discipline.

Hebrews 12:6 tells us,

"For the Lord disciplines the one He loves, and chastises every son whom He receives."

So yes, we should and must discipline our Prodigal, as much as is possible. But never lose sight of this - it is to be done in love. Scripture tells us "Love never fails." 1 Cor. 13:8.

This is short but there is enough to chew on and think about.

Gripped by Grace,
Hal

Prodigals... (part two)

Parents of Prodigals: Respond or React?
(The second of a few blogs)

In last week's blog I asked this, "Do you have a prodigal?" Then I said, "Be truthful. It doesn't do any good to deny it or ignore it. Once you admit it you can begin praying rightly and responding correctly."

Responding - not reacting - is what is important as you deal with your prodigal. When you react you say things you may later regret. When you respond you can take time to think and say those things and do those things which are productive.

I speak from experience. During the days of my son's prodigal experience I often tended to react rather than respond. I would threaten and yell. But the truth is that never worked.

My wife tended more to respond and encouraged me to do the same. To respond is to step back and look at the offence and lifestyle your prodigal is choosing. Then see how you can step in and say, "Stop" before your prodigal goes over the edge into the abyss.

Responding does not mean you are not firm. But you are firm in a constructive way. Instead of saying, "This is wrong and that is wrong." You point out the error and then give constructive insights to lead away from the edge.

Don't misunderstand, you may need to take the car or cell phone and cut off the cash flow, but don't just do it - explain the loving reason and not that you are just reacting out of anger.

So the next time you are dealing with your prodigal, think, "Am I responding or reacting?"

More next week...

If you have comments or questions about dealing with prodigals leave them in the comments section or e-mail me privately at hal@calerabaptist.org, If there is a need to reply I will do so.

Gripped by Grace,
Hal

Prodigals... (part one)

The Pride of Parents of Prodigals
(The first of a few blogs)


"My name is Hal and my son was a prodigal."

From what I have seen that is a variation of the AA meeting. Why do I start like this? Here is the reason. I have heard of one family today from out of state who is dealing with a prodigal AND I have talked personally with a parent today who has a prodigal. And we know of many more. The encouraging thing about the parent I talked with today is that they recognize their child is a prodigal.

It was interesting, I was just about to order a new book titled ,"Get Outta My Face" that I am looking at maybe teaching at CBC. The phone rang and we had a good talk about this parent's prodigal and the problem that many parents are facing.

Let me say this... if you have a prodigal, you will never be able to begin helping them or yourself until you are honest enough to say, "my son, my daughter is a prodigal." Pride will not get them to return. The truth is where you must start. You don't place blame on yourself or God. You just see that rebellion is occurring and your prodigal is out there.

My son Jonathan went through a time of being a prodigal. (You can read some of his journey on his blog.) It wasn't days or months but years. The return was not easy for any of us. It was drugs, alcohol, sex and you name it. But one day after an arrest and a charge for drug use, etc. the slow journey for home started for him. Now he is home. But DeeDee and I were never fooling ourselves - he was a prodigal and we knew it. (By the way I have his full permission to share his story any time.)

Do you have a prodigal? Be truthful. It doesn't do any good to deny it or ignore it. Once you admit it you can begin praying rightly and responding correctly.

More next time...

If you have comments or questions about dealing with prodigals leave them I will read them and if you want a response I'll give it a try. (or if you need to email me privately - you are welcome to do so at hal@calerabaptist.org)

Gripped by Grace
Hal